my heart aches for you, pete fijalkowski

i'm not sure why i decided to look him up today but i randomly google him every so often. pete fijalkowski, formerly of the britpop bands adorable and polak, who is the most underrated and under appreciated singer and lyricist. i suppose i've been in search for new music that makes me feel nostalgic. i re-discovered them in 2006. listening to both albums of each of his former bands brings me back to the days where i'd lock myself in my room just listening to music. hours and hours would roll by unnoticed. remember those days? i miss those days. those were days of youth and long gone. i am so busy these days, i barely have enough time to sleep.

pete has a myspace page offering 4 songs off of his secret acoustic solo album, unfortunately unreleased. one of which is a cover of new order's love vigilantes. one of my most favorite new order songs of all time. pete's version is alive yet slow and sexy. really sexy. while i love love bernard sumner's vocals, i am falling more and more in love with pete's. he also does an acoustic version of adorable's big hit, homeboy. it is quite dreamy. i am loving it just as much.

in the early 90's (after high school), i had an opportunity to see adorable play free at golden gate park in san francisco. however, i opted to spending the day with my boyfriend (at the time) which i've regretted for many, many years. fortunately, my brother went and brought back a recording of the show. i still have that cassette tape, somewhere. in the late 90's during the time i was living in san diego, pete's other band polak was scheduled to play in los angeles. so, i planned on going. much to my dismay, the show was canceled.

listening to both fake (despite having bombed when it was released in the mid-90's, is one of my fav albums of all time) and rubbernecking (according to pete, was never even reviewed or acknowledged) makes my heart ache for more. more music please, pete. pretty please. ♥

double shows, double the listening pleasure

venue: bimbo's
artist: elbow
who: rich, pati & lou
when: 8 may 2008 (thursday)
doors open at 7p

the last time i saw elbow was in 2002 (i think?). they were opening for the doves. my friends wanted to go for the doves, i wanted to see elbow. i ended up liking the doves more and rich ended up liking elbow. funny.

we had sushi in north beach for dinner before the show. when we got there, elbow had started playing. i didn't realize how popular elbow is. i don't think the show was sold out but bimbo's was packed like it was. we got lucky and found a table in the back. i've yet to sit back there. i always like sitting up close on the side or something. guy garvey is the singer of elbow. and he is brilliant. his voice live is quite beautiful. it sends chills down my back just thinking about it. listening to elbow on cd is no comparison to seeing and hearing them live. reminds me of how i felt about the shins when i saw them last year.

even though we missed (i imagine they played it) asleep in the back, the show exceeded my expectations. i hadn't been sure i wanted to go but then rich mentioned he'd go with me so i got tix. and so happy that i did! as always, we reminisced old times. it's hard to believe i've known these guys since 1993-4ish.

rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

it was great and perfect timing because the mary onettes were playing at popscene the same night. elbow ended at around 11ish and we headed over to 330 ritch for some dancing and more live music.

venue: popscene
artist: the mary onettes
who: same group as above
when: 8 may 2008
doors open at 10p

we got there in time for a little bit of dancing before the band came on. many of the bands that i see at popscene (they have live bands every other week if not every week) aren't that good. most of them, as a matter of fact, suck. big time. very few are good. and the mary onettes were one of these rarities. they were surprisingly fantastic. everyone enjoyed them. i was estatic that i caught both shows in the same night. i was afraid i'd have to miss the last part of elbow's show to miss the first part of the mary onettes. but i caught the entirety of both shows. definitely a successful night of music.

rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

origins of "show your scars" aka showurscars

in 2001, i moved back to the bay area from san diego. i was going through a really tough break up. i'd found out that the man i thought i'd spend the rest of my life with wanted to spend his life with another. and so, i left. i took a personal leave from my job. packed up and relocated to the bay area. i didn't have a job. i didn't know what to do with myself. i couldn't sleep or eat. 15 pounds melted off of me in a matter of weeks. i felt dead inside. i cried for days. and couldn't imagine moving on with my life.

i moved in with my brother and his wife. they welcomed me with open arms and took care of me. i spent my time with my pregnant-at-the-time sis-in-law (with jaden). we walked and talked. window-shopped and stuffed ourselves with whatever our hearts desired. i started to feel brand new. refreshed. alive again. but i had all this anger. i actively tried yoga and meditation. in months time, armed with a slimmer body and a new wardrobe (donated from my sis-in-law), i got back to dating.

dating wasn't so easy. i'd been so badly burned that i didn't know how to ever let my guard down. when internet radio first came out (free), i stumbled upon this song by elbow. and it kinda spoke to me (see lyrics below). it was beautiful. guy garvey (singer of elbow) has this unnervingly romantic voice. the songs make you stop and listen to the lyrics, carefully. and to find meaning in the words. in relation to life. the song is called asleep in the back, also the title of the album. this love song is perfect in the way that it reflects how unfortunate real love can be. it starts off gentle and tender. slow and beautiful. even clumsy and one-sided. the song just spills out emotions and pain. in the second verse, i heard these three words. show. your. scars.

were you crushed
did i rush you
all my time is yours
my twisted heart is yours
the faithless shit is yours
the shameless fits of love that only smother you for moments
until i fold them up and leave
all yours
(chorus)
oh you had to ask didn't you
oh you had to know
show your scars
not to rush you
the hieroglyphic hints in all the toilet scrawl
guilty little pins
and all the things i never talk about
are spilling with the gin
test how tough you are
all yours
(chorus)
not to rush you

i suddenly had this revelation. it was okay that i had these emotional scars. that if i let my guard down just a bit, i'd work through these "scars" and even be better. also a reminder that no one is perfect. everyone has scars of all types. and that essentially, i'd be ok in the matters of love.

long blondes @ popscene

venue: 330 ritch (popscene)
artist: minipop, nicole atkins & the sea, and the long blondes
who: lou & ro
when: 17 june 2007 (saturday)
doors open at 9p

we got there sometime past 10p and there was this line. ugh, i hate lines. as always, jorge was at the door and so i say to him, hey! what's going on?? he saw right through my attempt at subtlety and asked if i wanted to cut the line. ha! luckily, chris was there and let us in on the other side.

lou wanted to do car bombs and tried to order one from jason. i went to josh to get mine. unfortunately for lou, they no longer serve car bombs. however, i got mine. twice. my second car bomb was with jason. it makes me happy that i get special treatment there.

for some reason, i'm able to spot will out from a crowd or sense his presence. it's really strange and a bit perplexing. so when he came in, i spotted him from the corner of my eye. as i was in the middle of getting my second car bomb, i waited and figured he'd find me like he usually does. but he didn't. just as i thought to myself, i just saw him... he appeared right in front of me. except, he was sitting down and didn't see me. strange, he was sans girlfriend. he seems to be sans her frequently.

lou & ro stayed close to the bar while i hung out with will on the dance floor. then, i spotted adam from australia by the bar all the way to the left sometime before or during the minipop set. i went over to say hello. i haven't seen adam in ages! we chatted for a bit. caught up. he asked me if i was dating, i said no. i asked him if he was dating, he said no. he remembered me telling him about ted. i'd run into him sometime last year, after the break up. i remember he asked if i wanted company. funny. i told him i was sick of taking care of men and that i wanted to be taken care of. he responded, i'll take care of you and put his arm around me. he's really a sweet guy.

when nicole atkins & the sea came on, i went back over to will. she has a really nice voice. not quite the type of music i'm there for but it was good. it was slow and bluesy. lounge music type. she's got this great soulful voice. between her and the long blondes, will and i were able to squeeze some dancing in. which is always fun.

the long blondes are from sheffeld, england. as are pulp. and it turns out, or so it says on the popscene flyer, that fans of pulp should/will like the long blondes. in my case, i would fall under that category. as i love pulp and i do enjoy the long blondes. except, they make me think of sleeper than pulp with a hint of debbie harry. maybe it's the other way around? actually, i think of sleeper as the female version of pulp. there's attitude. a whole lot of it. louise wener is the sassiest britpopster ever. i love her. it's a shame that sleeper broke up in 1997. and i never got the chance to see her live. bummer. i'm pretty sure i'm off on the sleeper thing. i think i just want an excuse to think about them.

back to the long blondes. the music was good. contrary to the normal sucky bands that play live there. i should say, sucky live shows by bands we sometimes even like. their songs are upbeat, have catchy tunes, clever lyrics and best of all, they make me want to dance (just listening to it at my desk in the office). which gave will and me more opportunity to dance. we danced and danced. until the long blondes were done and the lights turned on. it was a great show. all three bands.

after dropping will home, the rest of us went to denny's. like we did back in the day (early & mid-90's). it was so euphoric. especially to be at the berryessa denny's. ah, i miss my youth. i think.

rating: ♥ ♥ ♥

we are the pipettes

venue: rickshaw stop
artist: the pipettes, smoosh & monster bobby
who: alex, lou & ro
when: 12 june 2007 (tuesday)
show starts at 9p

this was my second time at the rickshaw stop. i saw the silversun pickups there with lou & ro back in october. and yes, there is an actual rickshaw there. the opening was monster bobby who is part of the pipettes, well their back up band (according to wikipedia which may or may not be true). i liked his voice but couldn't really hear him too well.

the second opening was this band called smoosh. they were the female equivalent of hansen, except, they rock! i was so amazed and a bit shocked. they were so cute and talented. it's not everyday that you see an 8 y/o bass player. they also did a cover of bloc party's modern love which was most impressive. i thoroughly enjoyed these young ladies.

the only problem with the rickshaw is, upstairs, it gets really hot. i suppose heat rises but damn, it was damn hot upstairs. and that's where the seats are. so, that's where alex and i was. at this show, almost everyone was wearing polka dots. had i known that was their thing, i still wouldn't have worn polka dots. heh. i'm glad i didn't wear polka dots.

i really enjoyed the pipettes. they are super cool. only the coolest musicians have their own theme song (like tom mullaney, heehee). they also all wear polka dotted dresses that have the same pattern (fabric) with different styles. for example, one is a halter top dress, one dress has sleeves and the last one is strapless. all three sing and dance. and maneuver around and across the stage very carefully. it was immensely entertaining. they sing together as well as separately. it's refreshing to see a band take the time to put on a show for you. i'm so used to bands just standing there and playing their instruments. i enjoy myself so much more when i see bands get into their music. it makes me get into their music. but when they put together a dance routine, that's like the cherry on top!

rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ clap your hands if you want some more!

born in the u.k.

venue: gamh
artist: badly drawn boy
who: cousins lam & nina
when: 23 march 2007 (friday)
doors open at 9p

i actually tried to see bdb back in 2003. i even went to the fillmore to get the tickets. when the day came, i found out it was the night before. i'd missed it. i put it down incorrectly in my planner. i was totally bummed. i'd been waiting for him to come back ever since.

if you've never heard of him but you saw the movie "about a boy" starring hugh grant, you probably won't remember the music. but he did the entire soundtrack. just him. which was the main reason for my seeing that movie. i ended up buying the dvd (if anyone wants to borrow it) because it turned out to be a pretty good film.

back to 2007, when i finally saw damon gough (aka bdb). it was quite thrilling and fulfilling. i went with lam and nina. before the show, we went to this cool irish pub across the street from where we parked. it was pretty good. i had the salmon special which was quite good. prices were great too. the only thing was, they only take cash and we were scrambling for $$. but we had enough for two beers and two dinners with a side of mac & cheese.

the music was great. he's got a really nice voice. only, it was a bit sleepy-folky towards the end. either that or i was just tired. for a few of his songs, he would tell the story behind it. it's nice when musicians divulge personal stories of their songs/lives. knowing how down-to-earth they are in real life makes them even cooler. he played his early hits such as around the block and the shining. i'm not too familiar with the new stuff.

rating: ♥ ♥ ♥

smile

venue: gamh (sold out!)
artist: lily allen
who: lisa, cousins lam & nina
when: 6 february 2007 (tuesday)
doors open at 8p

i went to the lily allen show last night. and even though i only knew one song by her (thanks ro!), i went along because my cousin wanted to go. my sister lisa hadn't even heard of her at all which would have pissed off the fan asking for extra tix out front. i guess i mostly went for the company.

we got there at around 8p. there was this really long line for will call and then another line to get in. the crowd was so-so. we went straight upstairs to get some dinner. there were these little girls with matching outfits in front. i think someone's mother was there to chaperone. there were these older creepy men who pulled out all their dance moves. it was more distracting than entertaining. needless to say, lily allen brings in a wide range of people. which is not particularly good.

as for her music, i was pleasantly surprised by this 21 y/o. her sound was upbeat and crisp. really crisp. can i say that about music? that was the first word that came up. the songs were danceable and fun. there was a lot of dancing going on around us. and she was as cute as a button. i was really impressed by her. i've been listening to her other songs on her web site and they are quite good.

rating: ♥ ♥ ♥

hot chip @ the mezzanine

venue: the mezzanine (completely sold out!)
artist: hot chip
who: betty
when: 17 november 2006 (friday)
doors open at 9p

this time, we arrived 2 hours late and luckily, hot chip had not started. there was an opening band that was horrendous. so much that i don't remember their name. actually, i rarely remember the opening bands. we were just dying for them to finish up already. the mezzanine is an interesting venue. it's pretty spacious and there is a second floor with private rooms that were occupied with parties. they closed off the areas but you could still get through. and we did. we found our spot right up there next to a private party. i kept thinking someone was going to tell us we couldn't be there. but surprisingly, no one was the wiser.

the stage at the mezzanine is much smaller than that of the last show at the independent. actually, the independent seemed much bigger and better than the mezzanine. not sure why i detest the mezzanine venue so much. i just do. since the stage is smaller, the band could not rock out to their full potential as we'd seen at the last show. in addition, there are these huge columns in the middle of the venue and granted, they are required to support the structure of the building, it's a major obstruction of view to the stage. i think it makes more sense that the mezzanine is a dance club rather than a concert venue. greedy and sucky bastards.

i don't know if it was the lack of stage space or my foul mood of being at the mezzanine that made hot chip lose a bit of their contagious energy. it was still a great show but just not up to par as that at the independent back in august. watching the 5-6 cramped men on stage trying to rock out while playing their synthesizers and miscellanous instruments, just wasn't ideal for everyone. especially the band. but they made the most of it and gave a great show, which i very much appreciated. plus, you can't beat a $12 show!

rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

superb

venue: the fillmore
band: the beautiful south
who: betty
when: 11 november 2006 (friday)
doors open at 9p

once again, i missed the first part of the beautiful south show. this time, it wasn't a delayed flight. more like, a delayed friend. that's right, it was betty. assuming that there was an opening band, we arrived sometime past 10p. at least this time, it was only an hour later. i'm told we missed 20-30 minutes which isn't so bad except that the tickets cost $40 and there was no opening band and they only played for about an hour or so more.

otherwise, the show was awesome. paul heaton is brilliant. and so cute doing his little dances on stage. and utterly flawless in his singing. without any obvious effort as well. wish he would do some housemartin songs...

the new female vocalist sounded just like the one prior. they are both folky-sounding which give the beautiful south a more folky sound, unfortunately, that is. but i know i can't really blame the ladies for that. betty and i missed song for whoever which they played early on. bummer, that's one of my favorites by them. ugh, not sure what else we missed.

also, they did two encores! they left the stage and came back twice!! who cares about their fans that much? i've never seen that happen.

betty, if you are reading this, you know i love you... but you've really got to start doing something about this tardiness, i'm not sure how much more i can handle it.

rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ (despite missing the first half hour)

superbi

the beautiful south has a new album called superbi. their last album came out in 2004 but i didn't pay much attention as there was no tour. well, not to my knowledge. i've only ever seen them play once and it was in 2000. at the time, i lived in san diego. i flew up to the bay area for the show. there was a storm and my flight that was supposed to have left at 4p (the show started at 9p), was delayed so late that i missed half of the show. despite the ordeal getting there, the half of the show i did catch was awesome.

with a new album in tow (and on its way to me via amazon), they are scheduled to play at the fillmore (again) on friday, 10 november. they are only playing 4 shows in the states so this is very very special. i read somewhere once that they would play more shows in the states, except, it actually costs them money to play here so they don't come very often.

as you can imagine, seeing them live is not only very exciting (for me) but an extremely rare event as well.

over and over...

venue: the independent (first time!)
artist: hot chip
who: betty
when: 01 august 2006 (tuesday)
doors open at 8p

last night, betty and i went to see hot chip at the independent off of divisadero. parking was horrendous. we couldn't find anything for the longest time. and finally, score! only one block away! it was almost rock star parking for that area. heehee.

after playing real-life frogger to get to the independent, we found the venue to be very charming. it was big but small. bigger than venues like cafe du nord and smaller than slim's and gamh. the first band... um, fabulous something, sucked. they had these two bimbos on stage with matching platinum wigs as well as voices and cheap dance moves as a poor distraction to their awful music. it was like a storm. random and noisy. the music was bad. the songs were bad. the lyrics were even worse. the band was just bad. next was some bobby something's solo set. while he was a lot better than the first opening, after two or three of his songs, we'd had enough. he was like a cartoon character. he had a great voice, reminded me of sondre lerche. but his style seemed better on a tv jingle than live before a band like hot chip.

i wasn't sure what to expect when hot chip came on. there were 5 guys and a ton of instruments on the stage. i couldn't really see, as usual, so i ask betty, who the heck is singing? just like the good friend she is as well as brilliant, she suggests i sit on top of the railing by where we were standing. my first attempt at hopping (it was pretty high up) was pathetic and a little embarassing. so, i put some effort into the next jump and made it! and what a difference! to be able to see a band like them. it was amazing. there are two singers, alexis taylor and joe goddard. alexis does most of the singing. he's amazing. he's the short one, looks really young and kinda cute and is crazy on the keyboards and guitar. joe is older and a bit of a fatty but his voice is deeper like damon albarn and compliments alexis's soothing vocals very well. they were so lively on stage. it was refreshing to see such energy. which of course was contagious. i looked down at the crowd and almost everyone is dancing! it was just like a dance club.
i'm listening to the warning right now and it's great but hearing it live is no comparison. everyone there felt the energy. they were gorgeously amazing.


rating: ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ (i've decided to start rating the shows with hearts. 4 ♥'s means i loved them and would see them again!)

destroy everything you touch

venue: mezzanine
artist: ladytron
who: betty, lou, rich, ro, quyen, jen & jonathan
when: 28 april 2006 (friday)
doors open at 8p

this was the second time i saw ladytron live. the first time was at bimbo's during their first album tour. it was with pretty much the same group sans betty. i felt almost the exact same way... on a few hours of sleep from going to popscene the night before and dying because my heels were killing me. and it being very late. ladytron didn't come on until midnight or so. we left a little early and that was close to 1am. i was dead tired and glad i wasn't driving...

i forget who the opening band were, but that pretty much says it all. they were forgettable. that's better than saying they sucked, right? which they did. i would have so skipped them had they come up on my online radio station i subscribe to.

the night was supposed to be pretty interesting... ro and quyen who stopped speaking to rich and usually don't agree to go anywhere he'll be. but they did this time, so it was interesting how everyone would mesh. at first, ro didn't really acknowledge rich but later, they said a few words at each other, not necessarily to one another. i'm not sure that quyen said anything to rich. i didn't see anything interaction between them. it was a little disappointing but a good start, i suppose.

ladytron was good. there were two extra people on stage. betty mentioned she didn't know there were 6 people in the band, i thought there were just 4. apparently, they were from a different band on tour with them... or something. it was the first time for us at the mezzanine, bigger than we expected it to be. it reminded me of this club i went to in LA with joe & eric over halloween weekend last year. they did evil, that was a highlight. but i can't seem to remember the rest, aside from the overall exhaustion and my feet ablazed with pain. the show was pretty good but i prefer the smaller venues with seats and stuff.

swansongs

i've been listening to a lot of polak lately. i recently purchased their first album (out in 2000), swansongs. i got their second album when it came out in 2002 (i got it in 2003) and absolutely was addicted to it. the singer from polak was in the band adorable. he's got this really sexy voice. it's a little raw and a little dark. it's hot. and the songs are really deep and melodic. i loved adorable and still do. i always love polak. there are so many underrated bands out there, adorable and polak are two of them.

i seem to get into these phases... i am so in my polak phase right now where i just want to find out anything and everything i can about them. unfortunately, they don't have much out and i've got most of what's out there on them. bummer.